mental health treatment

Mental health treatment is something that has such a stigma around it and in my opinion, especially in 2023, there should not be any judgment about having to take time for your mental health and seek higher levels of care. When those dark times come and there aren’t many solutions, this is something that has really helped me overcome the mountains I had to climb to get to where I am today. Now I am someone who is willing to share about my journey, stable, and I have an openness that I did not have for the majority of my life.

This topic really hits home for me because I have had to go through treatment centers multiple times in the past few years. My first time in treatment was at the end of my time in high school. As an 18-year-old in an eating disorder treatment center for the first time, I was scared shitless. I had no idea what to expect. Would the people be nice? Would it help (because I sure as hell thought it wouldn’t)? Do I really need to be here? That was something I struggled with the most, imposter syndrome. I was constantly asking the staff, and myself, if I needed to be there because I thought there were so many other people in worse conditions than me. There was so much fear, shame, and hesitation within me that I told only a select number of friends and family. In my mind, I didn’t want anyone to know about my eating disorder to begin with, but people knowing about my treatment would have been an absolute nightmare for me.

As time has gone by I have done a lot of growing and changing, I mean a lot, I have realized that it is not shameful to be somewhere you need to be. The stigma is around mental health because you would never question someone in the hospital who has a physical illness such as cancer or if someone needed surgery, right? There lies my question, why is it such a big deal when people find out that I have been in treatment before?

At this point in my life, I am willing to talk about a lot of topics when it comes to mental health, but my life inside a treatment facility is kept pretty private to me, myself, and I. There is a difference between being able to share what is going on in your life and what is going on in your head. The raw emotions and vulnerability that come out when at these places is something that isn’t seen in day-to-day life. Over the years during the other admissions, I was patient, I was much more accepting of the help, and I worked my ass off to make sure I never have to go back, because what I learned, processed, and went through there, is one of the hardest experiences I have had to go through in my life.

What I hope you understand from this is that the news doesn’t have to be life-changing when you find out someone you know has had a higher level of care before, but also let them tell you what they want to. It is a very vulnerable time in your life inside those four walls and you truly will not understand unless you have been there before. So be a friend, support them, let them know you are there for them, and just listen to what they want to share.

(some happy pictures of me because of the work I have done in treatment)

k...now rage